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Sonic 06 is the Worst Game Ever Part 4 – Shadow

Written by Kyle LaCroix 18 December 2009 14,531 views 9 Comments

Mephiles_X_Shadow_by_ka1513_2[1]

I have never played Shadow the Hedgehog, thank God, but I assume it is something like Shadow’s sections in Sonic 06. But with more guns. Thankfully guns do not exist in Shadow’s story, but vehicular segments sure do. Oh they exist so much. Also traditional angst and “badass” are present in the storyline which, in what you would think would be a good thing, steps away from Silver and Sonic’s story for the most part. Unfortunately this only makes things dumber as it explains Old Shadow Mephiles.

Shadow ruined the Sonic franchise. He really did, he was okay in Sonic Adventure 2, but they kept deciding to bring him back to life. Sonic Adventure 2 was the last good main-series Sonic release, and I blame Shadow for the downfall. He’s there to angst things up while trying to be a badass. He has an “attitude” and constantly is trying to be “edgy.” Well, as edgy as you can be in Sonic the Hedgehog. He just became incredibly annoying and his parts in the game got dumber and dumber finally culminating in Shadow the Hedgehog. Things didn’t improve much in Sonic 06.

This is Shadow sucking the life out of the Sonic franchise.

This is Shadow sucking the life out of the Sonic franchise.


The story starts off with Shadow invading Eggman’s base which is conveniently located on Shadow Moses Island. He is going there to save Rouge and stop the Metal Gear retrieve the Scepter of Darkness. This first level is particularly memorable for one incident towards the end. There are guard towers that I need to destroy for some reason and Shadow specifically states that I’ll need missiles to take them out. Fifteen minutes of searching the area later there still are no missiles. There are, however, cars.

These cars are not very easy to enter and don’t control very well, also they do not shoot missiles. After driving around looking for missiles for a while, I accidentally run into a guard tower with my car. The tower then proceeds to shatter and I learn that missile is actually just another word for car. According to dictionary.com, a missile is:

  1. an object or weapon for throwing, hurling, or shooting, as a stone, bullet, or arrow.

I did not throw, hurl or shoot my car at the guard tower, well I suppose you can say I threw myself at it, but that’s not what the definition means.

I am almost certain that this is Shadow the Hedgehog gameplay footage.

I am almost certain that this is Shadow the Hedgehog gameplay footage.


This was not a good start for Shadow’s story at all, and it only got worse from there. Anyway, they grab the Scepter of Darkness and run along until Eggman attacks, causing the Scepter to break. Then a shadowy figure comes out and covers Shadow before disappearing. The figure then reappears as… Old Shadow MEPHILES.

Yes, Mephiles has taken on Shadow’s form because he was there or something. He then talks about how they have met before and proceeds to fling Shadow and Rouge into THE FUTURE. Then Shadow and Rouge run into Sonic and the gang and use Chaos Controls ill-defined powers to go back in time, except before hopping into the time portal, Shadow notices Mephiles and confronts him. In the past Rouge comes up with the brilliant plan of giving Omega, that robot from Sonic Heroes I think it was, a chaos emerald and making him sit around until he’s in the same time period as Shadow.

THIS IS SO DEEP MAN. SO DEEP.

THIS IS SO DEEP MAN. SO DEEP.


Mephiles is defeated, for now. Stuff then happens, and Silver and Shadow go back in time to the moment the balrog’s Iblis’ power was unleashed or something. Also Mephiles was released then too. We see Elise’s dad die and Silver and Shadow rescue Elise and then go back to their present time. Then Rouge, Omega, and Shadow have a boss fight with Mephiles in the present until Mephiles makes about a billion clones of himself and the plot ends leading way for a “dramatic” final story.

While all of this crap is going on you are subjected to awful vehicular segments. None of the vehicles control well at all and are incredibly annoying to use. Unfortunately, it’s Sonic 06, so they make you use them anyway. One level makes you play the most annoying mach speed section from Sonic’s story on a motorcycle. This is incredibly frustrating and took many game overs to get past. Also why is he even riding a motorcycle?

Mephiles_x_Shadow_by_Shas0[1]

Shadow can run amazingly fast, all hedgehogs(except Silver) can in the Sonic universe. Why is he riding these vehicles? How does the motorcycle go faster than Shadow? The final fight with Shadow in Sonic Adventure 2 had him running about as fast as Sonic does in the mach speed sections. So why throw these in at all? Did they realize that with guns gone from the game, they no longer had anything badass for Shadow to do? Do they just enjoy making bad decisions about gameplay?

That’s probably it, they just enjoy making bad decisions. It’s the only explanation for Sonic 06 and the horrible werehog in Sonic Unleashed. On the bright side, aside from vehicular segments, Shadow’s story was only painful in a few places. This series is almost over with only two more parts: The Final Story and my conclusion. The final story is an amazing mess of bad ideas, poor design, and bad plot. So tune in soon to see that. In the meantime, enjoy some Shadow fanart that we judged too extreme to go on the front page of the site.

The brain bleach is over there. Might need a lot of it though.

The brain bleach is over there. Might need a lot of it though.

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9 Comments »

  • John Greenwood said:

    Worst fanart hunt ever.

  • joe said:

    It sounds like you’re just pissed off that you suck at driving. All I got out of this article was “blah blah blah this annoyed me, wah wah I couldn’t do this, boo hoo I hate Shadow.” To each his own. I happen to think that Shadow is the most complex character in the series and that it succeeds in attracting a different kind of fan to the series as a whole. Compare Sonic to Dragonball Z (and there are a lot of similarities). Shadow is like Vegeta. Vegeta is the perfect rival for Goku because he constantly challenges his abilities, pushing him to try harder all the time to be the best. Such is Shadow for Sonic. They are the perfect rivals. I can’t understand your reasons for blaming Shadow for the downfall of the Sonic series but I respect your opinion.

  • Evan Krell said:

    Here is the thing, Sonic is a series that no one over 11 should be taking the plot seriously at all. The fact that any character would be viewed as “complex” is hilarious. And comparing to DBZ, which appeals to a similar maturity level, does not help your case. A Sonic character trying to be “edgy” is simply ridiculous.

    Also, he isn’t complaining that it is hard, he is complaining that the control is poorly designed. It is very obvious to anyone with a grain of understanding of good gameplay.

  • Ashura Glitch said:

    All i have to say is all of you are childish. A person who ragges on the games controls is just a fool who dose not get how to play. If you suck at the gameplay, easy solution don’t play and don’t complain, or get better at playing the game. Also, it seems you didn’t really pay attention of the game. I see alot of skipping and there are always other ways to get through a game. I mean if i couldn’t find missiles i would of driven into the damn tower with in five minuets. Just cause you can’t play worth crap gives you no reason to bag on anything. So either stop playing sonic the hedgehog, which i think is one of the greatest game characters of all time, or get better. And no i’m not trying to be mean, i’m just trying to say the flaws i see in how you guys miss say your words. Oh and comparing things is so dumb, who cares if things are the same in looks, it’s not the same as in the same.

  • Evan Krell said:

    There is a reason why this game gets poor reviews. Anyone who is knowledgeable about it can tell that the controls are POORLY DESIGNED. He beat the game. He is saying that its frustrating to play because of how obviously bad the controls are, not that the game is too hard.

    You are the childish one who lacks the ability to see clearly just how terribly made the game is. Reminds me of the fifth graders I talk to who defend bad games because they just don’t know any better.

  • Doug Funnie said:

    HUR DUR I’M A STUPID ASS WHO HASN’T PLAYED THE GAME YOU CLEARLY SUCK AT IT DERP DERP VEGETA BLAH BLAH

  • deejayee said:

    every sonic game sucks. dunno why all you nerds are so upset.

  • Shadowrulez said:

    Dude you just probably arent really the gaming type of person. my sister is like that. but shadow is really just the better version of sonic.

  • aw said:

    why are you talking to fith graders?

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